Category

Uncategorized

Get Over That Lie

By | Blog, Uncategorized | No Comments

Have you been deceived in one way or another and struggling to Get Over That Lie?

It is devastating when we have been deceived by a spouse, partner, family member, business partner or employee; we’ve put our trust into this person and feel betrayed and hurt. Even worse, we feel responsible.

Honesty-Humility

“Researchers have studied this tendency and labelled it Honesty-Humility,” says Notre Dame Professor Anita Kelly, Ph.D., in a Psychology Today blog post. “Individuals high on this trait are sincere, modest, fair-minded, and non-greedy. They do not exploit others, even when there would be no retaliation for doing so. Individuals at the low end of this trait, on the other hand, are dishonest, haughty, and arrogant. They lack empathy and exploit others.”

The more decent we are, the easier it is for manipulators to deceive. “There is recent evidence that honest people tend to see others, particularly close others, as more honest than they actually are,” Kelly writes. We give liars the benefit of the doubt by believing that others are like us. The opposite also true; Liars believe others to be as dishonest as they are, “and thus see even honest partners as deserving to be exploited.”

This combination is lethal, and in addition dishonest people spent a lot of time learning how to be trustworthy.

In conclusion, the chances of an honest person being taken for a ride, taken advantage of and lied to are very high. When this happens, how to move on?

How to Get Over That Lie?

  • Relax

When you’ve been taken advantage of by a talented liar or master manipulator, it just means you’re honest.

  • Forgive yourself for being fooled.

The responsibility for the harm done is not yours.

  • Don’t give a known liar the benefit of the doubt.

A consistent liar may not become truthful just because their deception has been exposed, not even when they have confessed voluntarily.

Be a step ahead of the game, learn the facial expressions, phrases and behaviours that usually signal a lie.

(Not yet subscribed? Get our FREE eBook here – 16 Tips To Knowing If You Are Being Lied To)

  • Check things out.

Ask for corroboration of a statement such as references, bank account statements, the chance to do an on-site inspection, or other independent verification. Further, if someone invites you to check out their references, past history, or anything else, always take them up on it, and REALLY do it!

  • Trust is earned.

Trust should not be automatic, let your trust be earned by action as opposed to word only.

http://vsapoly.co.za/over-lie/

If you’ve been challenged by lies and deceit, don’t allow yourself to wallow in the negativity.  Breathe. Take stock. Learn from the experience and move on.

 

I intend for your engagement on Social Media, please feel free to leave your comment.

And, your Like and/or Share of this Blog Post is much appreciated!

Subscribe to our family of Truth Seekers and you will receive our FREE e-Book and regular notifications of similar relevant blog posts, promotions and news from our Network and Industry.

Fallen Heroes become Truth Heroes

By | Blog, Uncategorized | No Comments

Heroes are people who teach and inspire us. My heroes are those who have faced the darkness of their past, and survived.  In my view Fallen Heroes become Truth Heroes, when they take responsibility for their actions.

Should they be exempt?

Even the most high-profile of household names can have dark pasts, heroes definitely aren’t perfect, yet they carry a tremendous amount of influence.  But when every word is recorded and every mishap is news, heroes are under even more pressure to behave perfectly. Our Heroes are human beings who transcend above the rest of us, but like the billions of other humans on this Earth, they are just as equally flawed. So, should our heroes be exempt from criticism, should they be allowed a free pass? Some would argue yes. Given the strain of living under a microscope, it’s natural for them to be human and slip.

I put forward that our Heroes are not like us. Of course they are human like the rest of us but they are greatly influential too, often shaping the culture we live in.   While that is admittedly a lot of pressure to carry, it should most definitely come with responsibility.

Examples from History

As evident from history, hero worship can easily go from brushing aside simple misunderstandings to blindly ignoring actual crimes;

  • First of all Woody Allen sexually assaulted his daughter and is still revered in Hollywood.
  • Also Sean Penn assaulted Madonna to the point of near death yet presented an Oscar last year.
  • Another is Chris Brown who beat Rihanna publicly and is on a national tour.
  • In addition, Eminem built his entire career on violent misogyny and has won 28 awards as a result.
  • Finally, Bill Cosby raped an entire slew of women and his comedy tour sold out.

These are blatant acts of terror that we collectively ignored in the name of hero worship.

Be accountable

If heroes are indeed human beings, then they deserve to be treated like one, including being held accountable for their actions.

Like the rest of us, they need to understand their actions so in turn, they can help others promote better values and behaviour.  They should not be in conflict with their obligations as a good human, and we are definitely not exempt from calling out lies as we see it.

So beyond the fanfare, after the scandal, when the truth is finally out, admitted and confessed, Fallen Heroes become Truth Heroes.

Fallen Heroes become Truth Heroes

Hansie Cronje

Fallen Heroes become Truth Heroes

Joost Van Der Westhuizen

Fallen Heroes become Truth Heroes

Lance Armstrong

Heroes like Hansie, Joost & Lance, who eventually told the truth and in my opinion redeemed themselves, thus remain my Heroes.

I intend for your engagement on Social Media, please feel free to leave your comment.

And, your Like and/or Share of this Blog Post is much appreciated!

Subscribe to our family and you will receive our FREE e-Book and regular notifications of similar relevant blog posts, promotions and news from our Network and Industry.

HR Warning!

By | Blog, Uncategorized | No Comments

Consider lie detecting to confront misconduct but be sure of all the facts before you commit to the process and heed this HR Warning!

HR Warning! Collect information

HR Warning! 1; Collect as much information about the incident as possible because this guides you to who to include in the investigation. Testing any employees unnecessarily may lead to a breakdown in trust and therefore communication in the workplace.

HR Warning! Follow the process

HR Warning! 2; Follow a process of inviting all identified employees to interviews aimed at establishing the facts. If any employee refuses to attend, charge them with the lesser offence of ‘failing or refusing to obey a lawful and reasonable instruction’. Or, possibly even with ‘failing or refusing to cooperate in a workplace investigation’.

HR Warning

HR Warning! Beware

  • A lie detecting test is not a requirement, rather consent is given in writing.
  • No discrimination and threats may be made.
  • Only questions previously discussed and understood will be used.
  • In addition, they may request an interpreter or any person to attend the examination. This person may not interfere with the process.
  • It is note worthy that a negative result indicates deception rather than being guilty of the crime.
  • Results of Voice Stress Analysis or Polygraph is used as secondary evidence only.
  • Other primary evidence is required.
  • Especially relevant make sure your disciplinary procedures are correct and therefore complete.
  • In conclusion confirm with your examiner that they are willing and able to give expert evidence of the tests’ reliability and accuracy to conclude your case at the CCMA.

What has been your experience, do you have any other HR warning to share?

Reference

I intend for your engagement on Social Media, please feel free to leave your comment.
And, your Like and/or Share of this Blog Post is much appreciated!
Subscribe to our family of Truth Seekers and you will receive our FREE e-Book and regular notifications of similar relevant blog posts, promotions and news from our Network and Industry.

What I experienced when McBride challenged Mokotedi to a Lie Detector Test

By | Blog, Uncategorized | No Comments

What I experienced when Robert McBride challenged Prince Mokotedi to a lie detector test.

December 2016 offered the opportunity to be involved in the well-known McBride Lie Detector Challenge with Mokotedi.

Gauteng Hawks head Prince Mokotedi leveled allegations of treason, conspiracy to murder and espionage against a group who allegedly plotted to cause the downfall of the president. McBride among others, was named in an affidavit containing these allegations that was used to open a docket on Monday 2016-12-12.

He responded by challenging Mokotedi to a Lie Detector Test who accepted initially but subsequently refused.

McBride submitted himself for a Lie Detector Test.

The mandate from our client was to determine whether any of the allegations made against McBride as described in Mokotedi’s affidavit, were true. The copy of the affidavit received had no Commissioner of Oath signature, nor the signature of Mokotedi. It was confirmed to be the affidavit used by Mokotedi to inform those concerned of the docket that was opened, and was the only copy available.

This presented the necessity to first authenticate the affidavit.

At our request McBride signed a statement confirming the affidavit in our possession to be a true and unaltered copy of Mokotedi’s affidavit. The veracity of McBride’s statement was then determined by our examiner Dolph Visagie. This initial Polygraph examination indicated a result of No Deception:  The examinee was truthful when answering the Relevant Questions of;

  1. (NO) “Did you lie in this statement?”
  2. (NO) “Is this statement a lie?”

Only then we were able to turn our attention to our mandate.

A second Polygraph was conducted with McBride indicating No Deception:  The examinee was truthful when answering the Relevant Questions of;

  1. (NO) “Are any of the allegation in that affidavit true?”
  2. (NO) “Are you in anyway involved in any of the allegations in that affidavit?”
  3. (NO) “Do you know for sure who is involved in any of the allegations in that affidavit?”

So, what did I experience as a professional from this McBride Lie Detector Test?

  • No Polygraph can be public. We insisted on the examination taking place in private and at a neutral venue. We rented the testing facility at the Omega Training Academy; a big thank you to our hosts Wessel Kritzinger and Roy Rawlins.
  • An examinee is an examinee. McBride was subjected to the Polygraphs strictly following protocol, there was no preferential treatment.
  • The client is the only recipient of the results. Despite pressure from the media, results remain confidential and are reported to the client only. This blog post was published with permission.

 And, on the lighter side I experienced that:

  • There is no such thing as time off in the Lie Detecting Industry
  • Reporters wear very casual clothes but have a stylish jacket on hand
  • Notorious/Famous Celebrities can fluster ordinary folks
  • Notorious/Famous Celebrities are just people too

Your engagement on Social Media is intended, please feel free to leave your comment.

And, your Like and/or Share of this Blog Post is much appreciated!

Live a life of Honesty

By | Blog, Uncategorized | No Comments

All around us Life is pulsating with inspiration to live a life of Honesty and Truth. It is courageous to live such a life. A Life in the present moment, the here-and-now, rather than distracted by our fears and doubts.

As soon as we succumb to our fears and doubts, Lies easily substitute the Truth – we tell ourselves the first Lie, that the Truth will hurt more. From experience I can tell you that THE TRUTH HURTS LESS – especially in relationships.

I find much Inspiration to live a life of Honesty in music, recently I came across this band:

Harem Scarem:

They are a Canadian hard rock band from TorontoOntario. Harem Scarem achieved popularity in Japan and their native Canada in the early 1990s. The band was active from 1987 to 2008 and again from 2013 after reforming. Throughout their career, they released 13 studio albums, plus numerous live and compilation albums.

Live Life of Honesty

In particular their Song Honestly, had much meaning for me during and after my divorce. In my opinion the meaning of the song is simply about our desire to mend a broken heart, and subsequently having the courage to ask for a second chance.

Here are the Lyrics:

“I stand before you, accused of many crimes
But I want to believe that love can still survive
You don’t have to say it, I don’t have to read your mind
To know the emptiness that’s finally arrived
How was I, to know the right from wrong
Words were hardly spoken, so where did I go wrong?
Tell me honestly, if you’re still loving me
Looking into my eyes, honestly
Words have more meaning, if they’re said at certain times
I need you now so I can feel alive
How would you know it, you wont give me sometime
To see if everything could work out, and you’d be mine
Oh, will love be lost forever or someday I may find
The words that I’ve been searching for
Are just some peace of mind…
Tell me honestly, if you’re still loving me
Looking into my eyes, honestly…
All the night I sit and wonder
Must be more to laugh, I’m sure that
Days and years gone by while I am
Living with the…
Oh, lonely feeling”

What meaning does it have for you?

 

Reference: History of Harem Scarem, YouTube Clip, Lyrics of Honestly

When you Subscribe to our website, you receive a FREE e-Book –

’16 Tips to knowing if you’re being lied to’

AND, notifications of new blog posts published, written with you in mind – a bit more personal, exclusive releases & discounts – directly from me – Henriette Joubert.

 

Please leave your comment, I appreciate your engagement.

And, Like and/or Share this Post if appropriate for you.

Question that Must be Asked

By | Uncategorized | No Comments

In my experience, when employers call us in for Pre-employment Voice Stress or Polygraph examinations, they mistakenly leave out a very important question in the belief that their background checks will provide the necessary information.

Our Advice on That Question

My advice is do not leave this question out. Because the prospective employee’s deviant behavior may not have been recorded anywhere, they may still have been involved; directly, indirectly or have knowledge.

And, the Question, I hear you ask…

Our Answer

Did you ever commit any crime?

Pre-employment Question to be asked

stolen bicycle

Percentage Crime not Reported

According to our acting national police commissioner Khomotso Phahlane and minister Nkosinathi Nhleko, the crime situation in South Africa has improved, with seven of the country’s provinces showing an overall decrease in crime.

But, in my opinion people have given up on reporting crimes to the police.

More than half of SA’s crimes not reported

According to Dr Jackie de Wet, from the criminology and forensic studies department at the University of KwaZulu-Natal, the under-reporting of crime is known as the ‘Iceberg Effect’;  where only 20 percent is known, the other 80 percent unknown, but it doesn’t mean it’s not there.

From a report; Victims of Crime Survey compiled by Statistics SA that was based on 31 000 households across all provinces, Dr. Jackie says “These figures, not confirmed or disqualified, would suggest the trend in South African society of crimes being under-reported.”

It must be noted that 3 murders went unreported every day.

While I sincerely hope your future employees are NOT connected to crime in anyway; it is always best to check, AND a ‘CrimCheck’ is not enough!

Reference: Victims of Crime Survey

When you Subscribe to our website, you receive a FREE e-Book –

’16 Tips to knowing if you’re being lied to’

AND, notifications of new blog posts published, written with you in mind – a bit more personal, exclusive releases & discounts – directly from me – Henriette Joubert.

Please leave your comment, I appreciate your engagement.

And, Like and/or Share this Post if appropriate for you.

Your Own Hotline

By | Uncategorized | No Comments

What information would you receive if you had Your Own Hotline?

Imagine receiving information vital to the success of your business. Confidential information via your own independent, anonymous HOTLINE!

National Voice Stress & Polygraph Network offer you insight into moods, opinions and operation of employees and customers and also suppliers. This insight will come to you by means of whistle blowing, an indispensable management tool.

Whistle blowing by means of your Own Hotline

Whistle blowing through your Own Hotline

Let us work with you to ensure the continued growth of your business!

Those who know what you do not, have a safe avenue through which they can communicate. As a result they do so without the fear of negative consequences. And therefore you are at the receiving end of this vital information.

In conclusion a Hotline together with Lie Detecting Country Wide by means of Voice Stress Analysis & Polygraph, you now have more crime & fraud prevention at your disposal. Finally, your own dedicated link to important information communicated to you, anonymously.

Can you continue without knowing what you should, rather, should you?

Call Henriette on 082 727 2153 or email today henriette@vsapoly.co.za and let’s talk about how we can ensure vital information is channeled to where it should be!

Subscribe to our website – this way you will receive regular notifications of similar, excellent and relevant Posts & Promotions!

Tell the Truth and Profit

By | Blog, Uncategorized | No Comments

Is it possible to Tell the Truth and Profit?

To Tell the Truth is an American television panel game show created by Bob Stewart and produced by Goodson-Todman Productions. It aired in various forms since 1956 both on networks and in syndication.  The show is one of two game shows in the United States to have aired at least one new episode in at least seven consecutive decades, as of June 14, 2016.

A total of 26 seasons of the various versions of To Tell the Truth have been produced including the 2016 version, and this subsequently surpasses the 25 of What’s My Line? and the 20 of I’ve Got a Secret.

A way to tell the Truth and Profit

To Tell the Truth Game Show set

A way To Tell the Truth and Profit? I say!!

The show features a panel of four celebrities whose object is the correct identification of a described contestant who has an unusual occupation or has undergone an unusual experience. This ‘central character’ is therefore accompanied by two impostors who pretend to be the central character; together, the three persons are said to belong to a ‘team of challengers’.

The celebrity panelists pose questions to the three contestants; the impostors are allowed to lie, but the central character is sworn “to tell the truth.”

After questioning, the panel attempts to identify which of the three challengers is telling the truth and is thus the central character.

I first came across this game show while watching a Leonardo Di Caprio movie – Catch Me if you Can

Tell the Truth and Profit

Tell the Truth Frank Abagnale Jr

This was a movie depicting the life story of Frank William Abagnale Jr.  I was impressed by this young man’s ability to be whoever he wanted to be, albeit fraudulently, without being caught.  Of course he was caught in the end, and, because he was so good at fraud, he was hired to catch others!

 Has Telling the Truth brought you Profit?

 Sources & Citations – Wikipedia

Subscribe to our website – this way you will receive regular notifications of similar, excellent and relevant Posts!